I was feeling a little dried-up this fall. Part of it was seasonal, I’m sure, and part of it was finally downshifting after more than a year of full-on production (book launch, speaking tour, wedding and The Freedom Immersion.)
With the exhale came the feeling that I’d lost touch with my creative essence. My joie de vivre had begun to hit snooze.
I’ve been told by many a psychic and astrologer and such that I have a lot of power in my second chakra. (If you’re unfamiliar with chakras they’re the seven energy centers of the body that are associated with different organ systems and aspects of our lives. The second chakra rules money, sex, and power.)
One actually said to me: “The kind of energy you have in your hips is the kind that builds empires.”
Power? What Power?
Another gave me an entire reading list of books to help me cultivate this energy. The list included titles such as When God Was a Woman, Untie the Strong Woman, and The Great Cosmic Mother. I have to admit that though they all sit on my bedside table waiting for me, I ordered them more than two years ago and haven’t cracked a single one open.
I’ve had moments when I’ve tapped into the kind of power they’re talking about.
Like when I’m at Zumba class shaking my sh*t, sweaty, totally in the flow, not thinking, just moving, and I feel like I can conquer the world. (Yes, sometimes you find your sacred self in Zumba. You just never know where she’ll turn up!)
But mostly I’m bemused by it.
One particular day when I was feeling out of touch with the sacred within me, I sat on the couch with my iPad browsing the interwebs.
Mike came home and could tell I was off, so he asked me what I was doing. I replied, with irritation, that I was just Googling some things.
He wanted to know what kind of things.
Sheepishly, I finally told him that I’d been Googling the Divine Feminine and sacred sensuality.
He looked me straight in the eyes and said:
What you’re looking for is not on Google.
He was so right. I was using my mind to research something that only my body can really know. I was using my intellect to find out about something I needed to go within to seek out.
Where to Find Real Life
The big things we’re seeking are not in a blog post that gives you seven steps to tap into your most sacred power or four modules on awakening the Divine Feminine.
What we’re really seeking -Truth, Freedom, the Sacred, the Divine – is found through living, not through Googling.
When I emailed a group of girlfriends with an SOS call about feeling dried-up and stuck, my dear crazy sexy Kris Carr wrote the following:
“When the creative shizzle fizzles I know it’s time to step away and truly live. Life is creative, too—in fact it’s far more creative than art. Make it as three-dimensional as possible, and you’ll be shocked by the ideas that start to flood in again.”
Reading that made me burst into tears, which is always my barometer of Truth with a capital “T.”
There isn’t an algorithm to teach us the secret to creative expression.
There’s no seven-step system for awakening our feminine essence.
There isn’t an equation that will lead us to the luscious, sacred part of us where we feel most whole.
In the last couple of months since Mike’s poignant reminder that what I was seeking was not, in fact, on Google, I have been doing a lot more living and a lot less Googling.
For example, I’ve been enjoying cooking for the first time ever. I’m reading cookbooks and planning meals – for fun! (I know there are plenty of people who’ve been doing this for years but trust me, this is very new.)
I’ve been going to BUTI Yoga and Qoya dance class. I’ve been napping. I’ve been taking weekends completely off, not just sort of off.
And wouldn’t you know, I don’t feel dried-up anymore.
If you’re feeling stagnation, especially when it comes to your creativity, sensuality, or sexuality, I would give you the same prescription Kris gave me:
Get off the Google (the iPhone, the computer, the digital device of choice) and get on with living, as full-out as possible. The best stuff not only to express, but also to simply enjoy, is birthed from life itself, not researching it.
What you’re truly seeking is not on Google. (Tweet it!)
Over to you:
Have you ever felt creatively dried up? If so, what do you do? I’d love to hear your thoughts on this or what resonated most with you in this post. Please leave a comment below!