How (and Why) to Write a Letter to an Angel

He barely spoke English. I spoke no Italian. I couldn’t figure out why he’d been so head-over-heels for me and then turned into an ice cube so suddenly. I only had two more weeks in Italy, and it seemed such a waste to leave with a broken heart.

So I wrote a letter to his angel.

My colleague and I had a difficult conversation coming up – I knew she’d be disappointed by my decision. She had a tendency to unravel emotionally and become a basket case when things didn’t go her way. I was dreading the phone call, and I just didn’t have it in me to deal with the emotional fallout.

So I wrote a letter to her angel.

Our daughter’s bedtime drama was escalating every night. More shenanigans. More tears. More hours. More exhaustion for all of us. Mike and I didn’t know how to fix it and we’d had it.

So I wrote a letter to her angel.

I’m a big fan of direct, loving communication when it can be had. But sometimes you don’t speak the same language. Sometimes one of the parties doesn’t handle direct communication well, and you end up just taking care of them emotionally. And sometimes the person you need to communicate with barely speaks herself.

This is when the letter to the angel comes in.

It’s my go-to when I’ve done everything I can think of to do on the human plane and I need to call in the higher-ups.

If you’re a doer like me and there’s a situation that you don’t know what else to do about, it can feel absolutely awful.

Writing a letter to someone’s angel (or your own) is something that you can actually do on the earthly plane. And every time I’ve done it, it’s worked.

Now, I don’t know precisely why it works. Whether you’ve got the angels on speed dial or you’re reading this with an eyebrow raised, here’s the truth:

Knowing that we’ve done all we can in any given situation brings peace. 

When you’ve done all you can and you’re still stuck, try the angels.

So, here’s what you do.

  1. Sit down with a pen and a piece of paper.
  2. Write the greeting. (I usually go with “Dear _________’s angel” for simplicity.)
  3. Thank the angel for all they’re already doing to support the person you’re needing some help with.
  4. Make a clear request for what you’d like help with in the situation. (I wrote that I’d love Penelope’s angel to help us have a calm, peaceful, quick bedtime ritual that is enjoyable for everyone.)
  5. Thank the angel again.
  6. Sign it. (I’d recommend with love.)
  7. Burn the letter.

That’s it. It satisfies the ego’s desire to do something while also connecting with that which we cannot see to get help. It’s equal parts active and passive, practical and mystical.

When I told my friend Kyle Gray who’s an angel expert about my letter to Penelope’s angel, he reminded me that part of why it worked is because I believed that the solution I was requesting was possible. So that’s another thing you’ll want to throw in there: belief.

I do not write letters to the angels every day (though I do chat with them regularly). I save the letter-writing practice for when I’m really stuck as to what to do about a situation, and for whatever reason just working it out with the other person doesn’t seem like the best solution.

I have literally never written a letter to someone’s angel and not had a beautiful outcome.

The Italian guy did a 180 within 24 hours, and the last two weeks of the holiday were a romantic heaven. (I did nothing other than write the letter.)

My colleague said the exact words on the phone I’d written in my letter to her angel. The call took about 3 minutes and it was no big deal.

Our baby girl went to sleep in 5 minutes and every bedtime since has been peaceful and enjoyable. (All my parents out there know that this is by far the biggest miracle of all!)

So, when you find yourself in a pickle and you’ve come up short in the realm of human solutions, try a letter to an angel. Can’t hurt. And I’ve found it always helps.


Do you ever connect with angels? Is the concept of writing a letter to an angel new to you? Tell me about you and angels in the comments. And, if you try writing a letter, please write in and tell me how it goes!


  • LOVE this post today! I connect with my angels on the daily (it is also a part of who I AM and it is my career). I really love seeing this more and more in the normal everyday! Belief AND appreciation make all of the difference. I have a super grandiose issue in our family at the moment, and I just did this. Seeing this post is affirmation for me. Ahhhhhhhh-mastay! Thank you for shining your light. XO

    • Kate Northrup

      I love that we’re on the same wavelength! Thanks so much for chiming in!

      • Pihu

        Hi Kate,

        Could you please let us know what you wrote exactly for the Italian guys angel to your office colleagues angel and to your daughter’s angel.

        Many thanks and look forward to hearing from you.

        • Kate Northrup

          Unfortunately I don’t remember the exact words but it’s about the intention, not the exact words, so just speak from your heart!

  • I recently started chatting with angels–something I had never done in the past (I think it was a Gaby Bernstein video that piqued my curiosity). In fact, on a recent international long haul flight ,we were stuck a row behind a family with two toddlers literally hacking up a lung. Since we have a 3yo and 8m, I decided (instead of freaking out and focusing on it), to ask our angels to shield us from the germs. By some miracle, none of us got sick. When we were deplaning, I saw a feather laying on the jetway while waiting for our stroller. Normally I would have blown it off as a pigeon, but somehow it caught my attention and seemed an odd place (apparently this is common). Since then, more stories and synchronicities have occurred. It’s very cool and comforting. I am going to try the letter for our infant son who has been waking up way too much at night since returning from our trip and I am at my wit’s end. That bedtime solution was definitely a miracle!! Thanks for sharing!

  • Maria

    I love this post, it was perfect timing for me today! I also talk to Angels throughout the day, it is something I’m fairly new to but I found that when I connect to something greater than what I can see here on earth I feel more grounded yet uplifted.
    Bed times and night time with our toddler are also a source of conflict for me. He wakes and feeds throughout the night and doesn’t like being in his cot, so I cuddle him in our bed. I love the closeness we share but I am sleep deprived beyond belief and my wellbeing is suffering as a result. I am so reluctant to cause him distress I’ve not known what to do that felt right to me and wouldn’t cause him and I undue stress.
    I absolutely love the idea of writing a letter to his Angel.

    Thank you Kate for sharing this!

    Love and light x

    • Kate Northrup

      I’m so glad this post was helpful for you. Let the angels help you decide what to do with your son and remember: sacrificing your wellbeing for your child isn’t good for your child in the end because they receive the message that self sacrifice is the only way to care for others. Obviously some sacrifice is required to parent but make sure you put yourself on the top of your list of people you care for!

  • This is a great idea! I love the 7 steps protocol for writing a letter to an angel.❤️ It is so wonderful to take the burden off of me. Thank you, Kate! So perfect!

  • Dee

    Hi Kate, you are speaking my language, and I didn’t realise it was a universal thing.. I have a ritual I go to my spiritual home, the Atlantic Ocean and sit in my car and write my letter to my Angels, pouring out my worries and cares and asking for help allthewhile releasing and handing them over. I then throw the piece of paper into the ocean and watch as the waves help float my troubles away and as I am on the West Coast of Ireland, I imagine the note ending up in America lols. I just recently couldn’t wait to drive to the ocean to write my letter of thanks and gratitude that my last wish had been fulfilled. xx

  • Erin

    I love this! It really is the perfect combination of practical (doing something proactive to assuage our brains) and the mystical (leaving it up to the angels/universe.)

  • Elizabeth

    So good to have a reminder that there is help out there – am feeling very very responsible for trying to sort out family issues since my mother died earlier this year and realise I have been struggling because I am trying to do it all on my own. Thank you so much for this reminder that there is very powerful help put there – and for the Resources List I received by email today, Kate! – I feel reassured now and reconnected and will most definitely be writing to all the angels involved, including mine! Elizabeth xxx

  • Patti Womack

    I wrote an angel letter last night to someone I wanted to receive a phone call from. They called this morning. So happy. 😊

    Kate, is this technique equally as successful writing to our own angels for assistance with our subconscious minds and releasing blocks?

    • Kate Northrup

      That’s so cool that you received a call so soon! I think the angel letter could absolutely work on yourself. Give it a go and let me know!

  • Christine

    I loved this article and the idea of writing a letter and expressing how you feel and what result you want, and then letting the universe take care of the rest. I have been racking my brain trying to think of how to approach a difficult conversation with a dear childhood friend. I love her and our friendship is so important to me. At the same time, there are some things that I need to say and I have been debating how to say them without hurting her or creating discomfort in our friendship. So this is what I’m going to do! I believe that once I do, the right words will come when it’s time to talk. Thanks!!

  • Rebecca

    Beautiful post! 8 years ago my husband and I were trying to have our last child. After having the hardest of many miscarriages, I was reading your mothers book, Mother Daughter Wisdom, and a passage about welcoming an angel spoke to me. I prayed right then & there for God to allow my grandmother who had passed away to pick a special angel to bless our family. The next cycle I was pregnant and I knew from the moment it happened it was the gift I prayed for the angels to send. I successfully carried our daughter to term and she was named after my grandmother in heaven. Even since, I have regularly felt the presence of my angels who watch over my family.

  • Michelle

    A young woman at work has a 16-year-old son who is deeply troubled – in fact, he has tried to commit suicide in the past. His mother has done everything she can for him: hospitalization, in-patient, out-patient, residential programs, everything, but nothing has worked. On the day I read your post, she was late because he had disappeared the night before and was still missing. (Not sure why she came to work, but no judgment here.) After she left my office, I wrote a letter to his angel in my head. Within a couple of hours, he returned home, having spent the night in the woods. While I can’t claim credit for his safe return – I’m sure many, many people were praying for him – I did write his angel another letter in my mind, asking the angel to help this young man get the help he needs to get better. Since then, his mother has told me – completely on her own, apropos of nothing – that he seems to have turned the corner in his desire to run away and in being able to open up to (yet another new) therapist about the voices he’s heard in his head since he was 6 or 7 years old. The synchronicity is just too strong to ignore. Now I’m using it all the time with excellent results. I’m not sure how this is different than Abraham-Hicks’s process of “turning it over to the Manager,” but it certainly works!

  • Sarha

    I enjoy this idea, and I’ll be sure to try it.
    Do you ever write letters to your own angel?

  • Jaz

    Hi Kate
    Your article is so powerful and magical I was looking for some ways to deal with some difficult people in life and I found your article.
    I also feel connected to the angels all the time as I can feel their presence around all time helping and guiding in the moments of need. Probably finding you is also their way of helping me with day to day things.
    I see bright blue and golden orbs of light here and there two times it was a very bright golden light big orb moving very fast around my arm another time I saw a light just moving forward over my head on left hand side while I was going for break with my other colleagues none of them noticed anything I have no idea what these things are . I want to do professional courses in reiki and I feel as something is provoking me and giving me wake up call to my soul I see lots of repetitive numbers and everyday come across amazing synchronicities . I love this stuff. Thank you for sharing your valuable knowledge with us It will help countless people to deal with their worries. You are wonderful ❤️

  • Natasha Ruffinpeterkin

    I did it for the first time yesterday. Is it normal to feel nervous, while waiting on the hoped for response.

  • Hi Kate,

    I would need your help to write a letter to some one’s angel who has turned ice like your Italian guy.

    Many thanks and look forward to hearing from you.

  • Mariana

    There’s one question left,
    How many times should I write a letter to someone’s angel?

  • kristina

    Thank you for writing this. I feel im at an impossible siuation with a msn whose closed me out
    I asked his angel to help hesl his heart and know that i have not gone anywhere. I believe that the best way to help somekne ud pray for them. .he is hurting right now and is angry with me.
    I love always my angels

  • Simone

    Hi Kate,

    Like another question above, how many times can you write to someone’s angel or even my own angel? Is there any sort of limit? Please respond soon if you can please Kate, cause I really need to sort some people out…lol


  • Latoya

    I have a true connection with the spiritual side. And receive messages almost every day.. its beautiful and also enlightening. I am going to to write an angel letter for my daughter and believe it will reach her. Thank you for this advice. 💖💖💖

  • I love this so much! Thank you for sharing this, it was so timely and I’m just glad I found your article. 💜

  • jessica

    Love it! without burning the letter can they write back on it? just asking

  • MJ

    My three kids are very differently wired. My oldest is cerebral – he’s all about logic, science, and rules. My middle child is tactile – he loves soft fabrics, tinkering with tools, and petting animals. My youngest child is expressive – he needs socialization, conversation, and inspiration.

    All three are smart and funny, and they’re all strong-willed. Their diverse personalities, combined with triple male (yang) energy often devolved into arguing, hitting, and temper tantrums. It was exhausting to ride in the car or sit through a meal with three little boys. Major meltdowns were a regular occurrence, especially in the late afternoon.

    In these moments, I found two things that helped. The first was to hold them in my lap. We called it the Wall-E box, because they tucked their bodies into a square, and I wrapped my arms around them, like the Pixar robot who created cubes of trash. If you’ve heard of Dr. Temple Grandin’s “squeeze box” for people with autism, it’s the same concept. I would contain their bodies until they could contain their emotions.

    The second thing I did was silently recite the “Fruit of the Spirit” in Galatians 5:22-23. It was a mantra for me and a blessing for my children: “love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.” Over and over again. “Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control” and I waited for them to settle down.

    Even though I didn’t say it out loud, my kids could feel the blessing, and they would calm down. One time my son yelled, “Stop praying! I’m still mad!”

    This works for adults, too. When a situation is threatening, scary, or overwhelming, repeating this mantra breathes divine grace into the situation. When something bad is happening and I can’t do anything, I recite these words. Like writing to angels, it shifts the energy.

  • Lindsay


    My husband and I have gotten to place of pride over communication for the past almost 6 years. Now, we are always throwing “us” away instead of resolving any conflict. So I wrote his angel. And I’m going to do a lot of praying tonight. I have a question though… after a disagreement tonight that turned huge, I came into our bedroom and was clearing of the bed (like we do every night) but some this time. I decided to go through this bin of stuff I gathered from the garage. Like cell phone chargers, books, wall decorations… etc. And inside of a cardboard box that had a cross and little canvas sign I found a Bible I have never seen before. I opened to see where it came from and hoped to read a name from a family member in it but only saw a church name with no city, county or state listed. Summer to be nearly read it used lol. Then I noticed towards the back was a laminated book marker. It had a poem on it titled “Special Angel”. I read it and teared up. Recently when we fight or don’t talk… I have felt very alone. Anyways I tried to read the book marked page but I’m having a hard time comprehending what is saying. The fabric book marker attached to the Bible was also testing on this page. Is this significant? Can you help me to understand our? Holy Bible King James Version (towards the very back)… Page 526 & 527 which is Titus 3:9 + Hebrews 6:7.
    Btw, I haven’t burned the letter yet. Kinda nervous of setting off smile detector in the house or husband catching me asking me what I’m doing and I’ll have to tell him. Not ready for that yet.

    • Lauren - Team Kate

      Hi Lindsey, wow! Sounds like a message you were meant to receive! What did you feel like the message was trying to say?

  • Nikita

    Hi Kate

    I absolutely love this concept and want to give it ago as im at my wits end with a issue at work, I was just wondering does it matter what you write on and do you need to put the letter in a envelope before burning it?

    Thank you for writing this article :) <3

    • Lauren - Team Kate

      Thank you for reading! I would tune into your intuition and see what feels good to you! Pen and paper always has a way of being really powerful.

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