Join my live money healing and expansion workshop – it’s free! Reserve Your Spot

Stop freaking out and just freaking enjoy.

My friend Terri Cole shared this quote with me last week:

“Overwhelm is just a mountain of unmade decisions.”

Mike and I are on a plane flying to Europe for 10 days. And yet, moments ago as we awaited our boarding call, instead of deliciously anticipating the romance of touring London and Paris with the man I love, I was obsessing and stressing in rapid, repetitive succession.

Despite Mike picking me up and twirling me around, telling me that everything was going to be okay, and smothering me with kisses, I just felt freaking OVERWHELMED.

You feel me? 

How many times has your stress about everything you have to do, everything you haven’t done — and everything everyone else on your team or in your family is probably not doing but should be doing — taken you away from enjoying the present moment?

I bet it’s a lot of times.

So, the reality is that I’m taking a vacation in the middle of an extremely full time in our business.

We have a BIG event coming up in Portland, Maine, on June 15th with 10+ amazing speakers and 500+ guests.

My book launches in a few months and it’s crunch time for planning and implementing the marketing strategy.

Our team is sprouting faster than I can say “chia,” and that growth requires love, attention, and mentorship from both Mike and myself.

We just moved, are still living out of boxes, and are in the process of hiring someone to help us keep the details of our life and business running smoothly.

About 30 minutes ago whilst awaiting our flight at the beautiful Portland International Jetport, Mike reminded me that our life is probably never going to be not busy.

You know what? He’s right. And his apt statement probably applies to you, too.

Your life is probably never going to be not busy. So just decide to enjoy the fullness. (Tweet it.)

How, pray tell, does one do that?

Well, I’ll tell you what I did just now that helped me plant my tush in the present and feel better pretty much immediately.

Try these 5 ways to stop freaking out and just freaking enjoy the moment:

  • Take a few deep breaths way down in your belly with your eyes closed. (I know you’ve been trying to suck in your belly all day. Just during this exercise let it all hang out. Trust me, no one is watching.)
  • Write down the most immediate, finite action steps you know you need to take. This step stops your mind from constantly and obsessively reminding you of your to do’s as though you should be doing them every second of every day (for more on this concept, read David Allen’s awesome book Getting Things Done).
  • Knock one or two items off the list that take less than 3 minutes each. While I was just sitting in the airport, I made a call I’d been thinking about making all day and sent off an email I’d been meaning to send for a couple days. Total time spent: about 10 minutes. Relief experienced: vast and profound.
  • Get excited about how great your life is. I must give credit to Mike for this one. He said that when he feels overwhelmed he focuses on how great his life is. Then he feels better. What can you put your attention on right now that’s awesome about your life? Remember: what we put our attention on grows. Focus on the great stuff instead of the overwhelm.
  • Make a decision or two. If, in fact, overwhelm is just a mountain of unmade decisions, making a few will immediately release tension. Start with one that’s not super complicated and notice how you get on a decision-making roll. Try doing this first thing in the morning while you’re still feeling minty fresh.

Instead of feeling frazzled and agitated, I’m now calmly watching the sun set over the friendly skies and listening to Tina Turner sing “What’s Love Got to Do With It?”.

And you know what? I’m getting excited about the trip.

Did I finish everything on my list before getting on the plane? Nope.

Will I ever finish everything on my list? Nope.

Will you? Nope.

Next time your mind is deep in the weeds of the project, the proposal, your marriage, moving, your job, or your life at large, do the 5 steps above and then remember:

You’re never going to get it all done. And that’s more than okay.

Thanks for listening. I feel better. I hope you do too.

Now I’m going to go enjoy Paris and I invite you to go enjoy whatever great thing you’ve got going on. (You know you’ve got something.)

Got any other good ideas for dealing with overwhelm? Write ‘em down in the comments. 

P.S. I’m doing a meet-up in London on Saturday, May 25th in Swiss Cottage at 11am. Email us if you want to join in the fun!

***Photo Credit: AlaskaTeacher on Flickr.***



  • Allison Ouellet

    Thank you, Kate. We are supposed to spend a week at the beach to celebrate our 5th wedding anniversary in June, and I was thinking about postponing the trip since we are in the middle of a huge product launch (among other projects) and are about to close on our first home. However, if you can get away when you have so much on your plate, so can we. My ass is going to be in the sand in a few short weeks! :)

    • Kate

      Yeah Allison! Way to choose fun! There will always be projects but your 5th anniversary only happens once :)

  • Sweet Kate, what a joy you are. Some hard to make decisions are sometimes better off being left alone. Just be still and wait, they will make

  • Shelley

    Thanks so much for this post! Just what I needed to hear today! I’m in the infant stages of starting a blog that I have a feeling will be a life changer for me, and am feeling OVERWHELM for sure. GREAT advice on how to calm the freak. Just took a deep breath and feel better already. Now, onto tackling a few, quick tasks!

    It’s so inspiring the way you can turn a personal moment of stress and then relief – into a teachable moment for so many. Thank you!

    Have a freaking fabulous vacation!:)

  • #LoveIt Thanks for sharing.

  • aaaah, thank you SO much this came right when I was about to rip out my hair but I took my deep breaths and thought about how great my life is and was so happy that you popped up at just the right time. have so much romantic fun in Europe!!! And congrats for taking time out even when everything is whirling around you. It helps us all!

  • I’m never gonna get it done! (I hear Abraham Hicks in my head as I say this :)

    Overwhelm management for me is : a slow Yin Yoga, deep pranayama, a delicious nap, going to the spa, keeping my weekends computer free, wild dancing in my living room, playing with the dogs & cuddling with my Sweetie :)

    Thanks for the reminder Kate and have fun in Pariiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis!!!

  • Pick 3 things on my list of things to do that actually I DON’T have to do. That’s right. Just cross them off and agree NOT to do them! I think I need to do everything. I just don’t! Ahhhh, much better.

  • Great wisdom shared, Kate & Mike. I have had a lot of these same feelings as I exited San Francisco to spend a month in Waikiki. I have really needed this time of relaxation and rejuvenation with the ocean and am having a wonderful time. Once I was able to breathe deeply and relax into my time here, I started to receive creative inspiration and ideas that will help my businesses in the future. I have also gotten clearer on some of my “opportunity” lists ( I like this better than “to do” lists). So my mind has relaxed, my body and spirit have relaxed and I will return to SF rejuvenated and with new motivation, drive and opportunities unfolding. Gratitude, as you mentioned, is most important. I am grateful for so much. Thank you for your inspirational and passionate sharing with others. It is truly a gift. Enjoy your amazing trip to Paris! Namaste, David

  • I can truly feel your pain, Kate. The list is “never-ending” and always will be. My tried and true tip is, as Brian Tracy says, “Eat that frog!” First thing in the morning, tackle the one or two things on your list that you dread, and you will immediately feel an overwhelming sense of accomplishment that will carry you through your day.

  • Ann

    Kate I remember you doing a reframe of “overwhelm” and it went something like this:” instead think of your life as being full of possibilities and opportunities”.
    I like to practice “being where my feet are” enjoying the moment and cross each “to do” off my list as I go .

  • Lynn

    Breath in, breath out…. Thank you Kate. I have felt in a constant state of being overwhelmed since B-school started and still feeling just as overwhelmed!!! And just for the record….as I follow you…..I often wonder how you get all that you get done already!!! Hugs!!!!

    • Kate

      Lynn, your timing is perfect and elegant. B-School will be there for you forever so don’t rush the process!

  • Jamie Leff

    You are my angel! I literally had this exact meltdown moments ago. There were tears, fights with my man… I was one hot mess. You see, I too am building and working with a team, working a day job, and oh yeah, planning a wedding that is to take place in less than 3 weeks!!! I’m on uber overwhelm!!!! I finally stopped, took a deep breath, and there you were. My personal fairy god mother!!! Have a fabulous trip!!!

  • THANK YOU! Divine timing for sure! I am blessed to have a business that I love that keeps growing! I developed a habit of putting my life on hold during my busy times…well the busy times don’t seem to stop anymore. I realized i needed to stop putting me on hold! Setting boundaries, making a schedule of myself as I do for my team ( punch in and out times), shutting off the cell phone, moving my office out of the main level of my home…all helped. Also a spiritual counselor recommended a book to read “Hiring The Heavens” by Jean Slater check it out…it changed the way I roll!

  • Thank you, Kate and Mike. I needed to hear that today. As a person who makes her living taking things off of others’ plates and putting them on my own, it’s easy to end up in overwhelm. Being grateful for how awesome life really is can be the most freeing feeling when overwhelm creeps in. Cheers to you both and go enjoy that vacay!

  • I feel you! Thank you, beautifully said.
    Have fun in London & Paris, next time come to Amsterdam too!

  • Mimi

    Kate, it is very cold and raining in Paris so I hope you took some warm clothes with you! Enjoy your trip in lovely Paris!

  • LOVE your post, Kate!

    I take the “I Don’t HAVE To Do Anything Challenge”. It can be scary to claim “I don’t HAVE to do anything,” yet we often create those “have to’s” and due dates in our own mind. Yeah, it’s a huge mindshift to make, but if you can look at your list & challenge the “HAVE to” for each item, it can be very liberating.

    The key is not to argue why you have to do it, but to see the possibility of not doing it now. (It will usually be ok if you don’t.) Then what IS most important rises to the top and you can come from a place of doing what you choose to do.

    Once you do it a few times, it’s quick and easy – what’s important pops right up. :-)

  • I don’t think this message could have came at a better time! Thank you!!

  • Michaela

    Thanks for the push to create some concrete “do’s” when your mid freak out. I tend to spin & do something totally unrelated & unproductive when I’m in that state. Making a list from the heart sounds brilliant when you’re mid storm.

    I also appreciate the lens shift to pleasure. I’ve been doing more lately, & not necessarily having more fun in the process :(. Thank you for showcasing how it can be done. Great reminder, & great sharing. xox

  • Daniëlle

    Great message! G’d knows I needed that. ;)If you’re ever going to be in Amsterdam I’d love to meet you. Have a safe and awesome trip. XXX

Leave a Comment

Site Design Studio DBJ
Site Development Alchemy + Aim