As I prepare for giving birth a second time and stepping into a whole new version of motherhood with two kiddos instead of one – and I try to do everything within my power to get ready – I’m feeling the truth of the following statement:
I am already ready, and I will never be ready.
Despite doing many things to prepare myself for birth and motherhood the first time around, I had no idea how intense it was going to be, and looking back now I see that while I’m sure none of my preparations were wasted, there’s literally nothing I could have done to fully prepare me.
And while I know the only thing that will truly make me ready to be a mother of two is the experience of mothering two, I also know this:
We all have everything we need within us right this second.
We don’t need another course…
We don’t need a coach…
We don’t need to read another book…
We don’t need more information…
Or more insight…
Or another practice…
…to tap into the brilliance and resiliency of who we are.
We have all of this within us already. It’s just a matter of remembering.
After having our first daughter Penelope, I read tons of books (mostly on baby sleep) and spent a lot of time Googling and chatting with other moms in Facebook groups. In retrospect, what I thought was trying to become the best mother I could be was actually a thinly veiled cover for grasping for control in a situation that left me feeling the least agency I’d ever felt in my life.
And then as a reply to one of my social media posts, someone responded that a nurse had given her the best parenting advice she’d ever heard:
I read it and the truth of it ran through my veins like a healing, calming elixir that my frayed system desperately needed.
That day I took all of my baby sleep books off the shelf and gave them to Goodwill. I’d relocated my agency the moment I stopped trying to source my mothering from somewhere else and instead brought myself back home to my baby, my home, and my body. If my body knew how to grow this tiny human, she certainly had the wisdom to guide me through how to best take care of her.
There’s infinite information, insight, and wisdom on the planet. We were all given God/Goddess’s direct line. Some of us simply forgot where we wrote it down.
I write this with a sense of irony, given the fact that I work in the personal growth industry. So I’m not telling you not to buy any more personal growth books or take any more workshops. (I would be SUCH a hypocrite if I did.)
Do I believe in the work that I do in the world? Hell, yeah. Will I keep attending seminars, searching my soul, going on retreats, and listening to others for wisdom and insight? You bet your bippy.
But today I’m simply reminding us both that the best answers come from within, and even when we hear them from another source, the only reason they ring true is because they resonate with something that we already know inside.
If we went within and asked our souls more questions instead of looking for answers outside, we would probably spontaneously combust from unleashing the spark of divinity cooking away in there at all times.
As we welcome our second baby girl into our family and I inevitably find myself feeling out of control from time to time, I vow to myself and my girls that I will check in before I check out.
When we let the fields of input lie fallow for a season the next time we walk into a seminar, take a course, or open a personal growth book, we’ll be coming from a place of fullness instead of emptiness. We won’t be looking for the missing piece of information to complete us or fill in the gaps where we’re failing. Instead we’ll be browsing for the cherry on top of our already incredibly dense, deep, sweet, wise cakes of self-assurance and personal knowing.
So my reminder to you (and me) today is this:
When it comes to mothering, business, marriage, and everything else, your best answers are sourced from within.
Start there and you’ll feel found a lot more of the time than you feel lost.
You already have everything within you that you need.
You are full already. You came in that way. You are lacking in nothing.
You’ve got this.
OVER TO YOU:
How do you check in with yourself and your inner guidance? What practices do you have around this? Let me know in the comments!