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Are you a prayer?

Are You A Prayer?

A friend of mine posted on Facebook requesting love to be sent to someone in need.

The way she phrased the beginning of her request stopped me in my tracks.

“If you’re a prayer…” she said.

What she meant was if you’re someone who prays (I am). But what I read was if you yourself are a prayer.

Like, are you living your life as though it’s a prayer?

And if so, what is your life a prayer for?

Are you addicted to being “crazy busy” and praying for more days that feel out of control?

Or are you curating what makes it onto your calendar and praying for more days that feel spacious?

I’ve been pondering what I’m praying for by living my life the way I live.

What I love about seeing myself and my life as prayers is that nothing gets thrown away. There is no such thing as the mundane. Everything counts.

I’ve always loved the phrase my mom taught me:

“How you do it is what you get.”

It’s been a compass reminding me that the way we get where we’re going matters just as much as whether or not we get there.

Living your life as a prayer, in fact being a prayer yourself, takes this even deeper (or higher, whichever way you fancy going).

When I complain about how exhausted I am, I’m praying for being tired.

When I stress out about not getting enough done, I’m praying for feeling frazzled.


When I savor the surrendered, still weight of my daughter in my arms as I return her to her crib after a midnight feeding, I’m praying for presence.

When I pause and breathe into my heart before responding to something my husband said that rubbed me the wrong way, I’m praying for peace.

When I spend money at the corner market that supports local, organic farmers instead of  buying produce that’s been slathered with pesticides and shipped from another country, I’m praying for Mother Earth.

When I reach out to a friend for no other reason than to say I’m thinking of her, I’m praying for connection.

When I look back on my day and choose to focus on what worked instead of what didn’t, I’m praying for fulfillment.

We get more of what we want by being what we want. {Tweet it!}

We get more of what we want-tweet

Be a prayer for what you want in your life.

Be a prayer for what you want in your world.

Be a prayer.



  • J A

    I don’t know if I could be a prayer.
    I guess it depends on what you think a prayer is.
    To me, prayers are sacred. As a human being, I don’t think I am.
    And prayers are the means by which we open ourselves to God. Sometimes to talk, sometimes to listen.
    Sometimes to simply be in the presence of God.

    • Kate Northrup

      Interesting perspective. I see humans as sacred because we are connected to the Divine. But to each his/her own.

      • Patricia Keene

        Yes, indeed! We cannot be separated from the ONE, God, Great Spirit – whatever we choose to say. I have always liked to think of it as “we” are little pieces of God, operating in the world as expressions of the divine and eventually come “home” to the great void, merging again with God.

      • Natalie

        I’m trying to get my head around this Kate. Would you, could you, offer a few more examples of how you define “be a prayer”?

  • Bettina Bowers

    Loved this–great way to start the day.

  • Lily

    Thank you for this, Kate. What a beautiful reminder. I am realizing that all morning, and for the last few days I have been being a prayer for my sensitivity to be a burden instead of a gift. Sometimes this feels like a very challenging one for me to shift. Blessings to you.

  • Nancy

    This is a great and inspiring piece. I am thinking what is my prayer right now.
    I get to choose, in every moment, in every meeting, in every situation. Thank you, for being an inspiration to me and so many others. Thank you God for Kate. Amen

  • This is my second time ever posting a comment. The first time was on B-school a couple of days ago. I’m always a voyeur because I tend to be very private. But this resonated with me so much I had to comment. I was lucky to be able to leave my full time job a couple of years ago and open my health coaching practice. One of my why’s was so I could have a flex schedule and pick up my grandson at school every day. Some days though I think did I do the right thing because I am always working to make sure I always have clients. When in reality I love my life now and am privileged to be doing what I love and getting paid for it. Thank you for reminding me of this and to be a prayer for this instead of wondering if I should have stayed at a place that was drowning me because I was making more money and had a perceived sense of stability.

  • I loved this! Beautifully put… Just this week I wrote to a quote that I carry with me: “You condition your mind so that your whole life is a prayer. Day in and day out.” ~Napoleon Hill


  • Lois

    “When I look back on my day and choose to focus on what worked instead of what didn’t, I’m praying for fulfillment.”

    This is my favorite thing in the blog this morning. What a great way to reframe your day. I am going to focus on this thought, instead of feeling stressed and anxious. Thank you Kate.

  • I love how grounding this message feels. It feels more real with the examples you gave. I am a spiritual person and we are all spiritual beings but recognizing each thing that we do as a prayer feels more tangible to me. Plus I also see my daughter as a prayer…a big one :)

  • This is the best blog I’ve ever read of yours. In response to the comment above prayers are sacred but we are meant to be living sacrifices to God and prayers are what we lift up to Him. How we live is certainly a way to being praying for things and it’s a great reminder to live in a way that I want more of.

  • Suzy

    Oh my goodness Kate. This made me cry – touched me deeply. I read an earlier comment about prayers being sacred. I believe I am a vessel here on earth to be guided by God|Universe|Divine, when I’m living from my soul, for me this is living in prayer and this is when I do feel sacred and my strongest connection to source/God. Living in prayer, as you so beautifully put it, is living from my soul. Thank you for this! xoxo

  • Kate, this is simply beautiful. Blessing to your day!

  • Lu

    Hi Beauty, Your mom’s powerful quote got me. “How you do it is what you get.”
    This is reflection perfection. Thank you.
    Im getting visuals in future video’s of you guys planting big spontaneous kisses the moment your bugged by each other… :) me on too much coffee!

  • Nanci Adair

    One of my favorite quotes is People who believe in prayer are those who pray. I also loved your writing focus of living your life as a prayer. A few years ago, standing at the entrance of our Portland New Church labyrinth and asked to mark my intention the following words came to me; Be the Love You Want to Receive.

  • This is beautiful! I start out the day with positive prayer and I AM affirmations.
    I am Love, I am Peace, I am Joy and I send those thoughts, intentions and feelings out to everyone and every situation I meet and it makes the day flow smoothly. ~ Connie

  • Laura

    When I am willing to go into the depths, I am praying for Authenticity. When I am faced with fear, and continue to lean forward, I am praying for Courage. When I reply to a Blog Post, I am praying to be seen. When I step out of my comfort zone, I am praying for something to catch me in the abyss of terror. When I acknowledge my humanness and share raw emotions in a safe space, I am praying for vulnerability to vanquish shame.

    Thank you, Kate, for this wonderful inspiration. Reframing the idea of Prayer in this way is brilliant.

    Yesterday I got news of an unexpected (and unexpectedly onerous) Tax bill.
    I tumbled into fear, shame, pain, and today I’m climbing out. Your mission and your messages are giving me strength and hope.

    Thank you.

  • Wow, this is beautiful, Kate. Thank you so much for putting this thought into my head. I will carry it forward and share. Have a blessed day! xo

  • Kate
    I think this is one of the most meaningful blogs I’ve read in a long time. Thank you for sharing what you were reminded of. It certainly brought many things to mind in my daily actions.

  • Angie

    1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

    “Always be joyful. Never stop praying. Whatever happens, give thanks, because it is God’s will in Christ Jesus that you do this.”

    Have a great day Kate!

  • Love this notion of not only doing prayer but BEING a prayer. Yes, sometimes my prayer is for more time…I want to strengthen my prayer for being a beauty maker, beauty creator, beauty healer! Inside out. Words and body. Amen. Namaste.

  • Patsy

    Outstanding! Thank you for such a thoughtful, insightful commentary.

  • Rose

    I loved Your thought on if your living your life as a prayer. It made me think of Dwayne Dyer thoughts on what is behind the intent of each of your actions. This is what I try to do in my life…. It reminded me of This quote ” Strive that your actions day by day may be beautiful prayers. Turn toward God and seek always to do what is right and Noble, enrich the poor, raise the fallen, comfort the sorrowful, reassure the fearful, rescue the oppress, bring hope to the hopeless, shelter the destitute. ” writings of the Bahai Faith Abdul-Baha

  • Ces

    Thank you for sharing these perfect words and concept Kate. I consider myself to be a prayerful person because I pray. I truly appreciate the notion of BEing the prayer that I’m praying for, it’s a new approach for me to consider and I’m excited to live it out:)
    As a new mother (my son is 5 months old) I resonate with much of what you convey in your entries post P’s birth. Thank you for sharing some of your motherhood journey as well.
    Peace and blessings to you and your loved ones. Ces

  • Thank you Kate! lovely post. I especially like the specificity in your examples “When I reach out to a friend for no other reason than to say I’m thinking of her, I’m praying for connection.

    When I look back on my day and choose to focus on what worked instead of what didn’t, I’m praying for fulfillment.”

    In this moment I am full after deep time in nature on a women’s gathering I led in New Mexico. I think what I most pray for is to pick back up my daily schedule in a way that feels as light and spacious as my time away. I’m praying for integration.

    Warmly, Courtney
    PS Loved the picture which accompanies this post. It reminds me of one of my favorite quotes “We need a coat with two pockets. In one pocket there is dust, and in one pocket there is gold. We need a coat with two pockets to remind us who we are.” Parker Palmer.

    You can see a picture I took with gold dust in my hand in the link I shared above. xo

    • Kate Northrup

      Thank you Courtney! Your prayer for integration is beautiful and so is the quote about the coat with two pockets – I’ve never heard it before!

  • Kate Northrup

    Beautiful. I love that!

  • Great post, Kate, I love this perspective. When I first read, ‘Are you a prayer?’, I thought of it as are you the answer to what someone else is praying for, be it a smile, a friendship or a business connection, etc that will move them forward and closer to what they desire in life. I agree with both my interpretation and yours! Love your insightful work!!

    • Kate Northrup

      I love your alternative interpretation of are you a prayer – the possibilities are endless, aren’t they?

    • Tim

      Something I have witnessed at times in my life and in the lives of others around me:

      The Lord provides… & sometimes I am the provision.

      Thanks for this article and string of comments.


  • I do pray and have a prayer list of people who have requested prayer for issues in their life. Prayer is listening to life, the divine. Usually I simply state their full birth name and ask for love. That works for everything folks. Love, more love-like the Dixie chicks song- More Love. Put it on and dance to it. If people know you pray they will start telling you to pray for them or their friends. My neighbors have asked for prayer for their dog, Lucus who is going in for surgery.
    I’m on it. Please join me whenever you feel moved to. It’s fun. Cherish silence where listening to the divine is much easier than if you have the radio on.
    Thanks for the post Kate.

    • Kate Northrup

      I absolutely LOVE that song by the Dixie Chicks. Thank you for reminding me of it and for praying for your community!

  • LOVE this. So delicious and transformative, while still being so simple. Such wonderful insight, Kate. My prayer is for peace, love and magic. I am working to create more of it minute by minute. xoxo!

  • Vanessa

    This is my most favourite post you’ve written. The process of non religious, yet spritiual prayer had been on my mind. Thank you thank you for these words. Resonated big time!

  • Tatyana

    Dear Kate,

    I had just such big AHA…And inspiration and feeling of something beautiful…and… And…and.. I’m speechless! You see, I can’t find the words for what I’ m feeling!
    Thank you so much for this post!!!!
    I ‘ m your fan forever!!!

  • Sheila

    Great post. It reminds me of something Joel Osteen said. It went something like’ whatever follows ‘I am’, you are sending it to the universe. ‘I am’ smart, I am beautiful, I am patient and you will notice these positive things in your life. Compared to ‘ I am’ stressed and tired; you will attract more stress in your life. We are a prayer. What we pray for will manifest itself in our lives. Thank you for the e-mail.

  • “How you do is what you get” SO very powerful, both this line and this entire post! Thank you for sharing this today, an awesome post for getting over the “hump” on this hump day, and a great reminder for how to live day by day, minute by minute

  • Dear Kate,

    I read this first off by skimming my inbox and even though I had to wait to read the full article, just the thought, just the seed you planted in my head that I, myself could be a prayer, was huge.

    After reading your thoughtful post, I just want you to know how much gratitude I have for the Prayer that is You.

    the Prayer that is Me

  • A mutual friend of ours turned me on to your blog when I started mine. I really love it and this post was a great reminder. Thanks for bringing your wisdom and levity to the world! ❤️

  • Kate!
    This is my all time favorite post of yours!
    Thank you

  • Eric

    Thank you for this very timely reminder. Yes we are a prayer and we can always be a blessing for others. Let’s make this a better place for everyone.

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