Blog Posts

The slow, messy, effective path to freedom.


When I’m feeding my baby Penelope, sometimes she likes to grab the spoon and feed herself.  Anyone who’s ever witnessed a baby feed herself knows that more food ends up on her face, in her hair, and on the floor than in her mouth.

It’s way more tidy and efficient when I just spoon food into her mouth and collect the bits that get on her face with my spoon in between bites. After the meal all she needs is a quick wipe with a wet cloth, and she’s all clean again.

After she feeds herself, though, I pretty much have to hose her down. It’s not efficient at all. In fact, it’s a production.

So a lot of days I dodge her chubby little, dimpled hands with my spoon and get the food straight from the bowl into her mouth. I just don’t want to deal with the mess.

The thing is, though, if I never give her the spoon to feed herself, how’s she going to eventually figure out how to get the 90% of sweet potatoes that currently end up on her cheeks, chin, forehead, ears, and head into her mouth instead, where they belong?

She’s not.

And I’ll have to feed her forever.

So even though it takes longer and it’s way messier, I’m going to start giving her the spoon more often (not every time because mama doesn’t have time for 3+ baths a day).

I’m also handing the proverbial spoon off to the emerging leaders in our network marketing business more. I’m giving them the chance to do things I’ve always just done myself because I already know how and I don’t feel like taking the time to train someone else.

Are my presentations tighter, more polished, and more efficient? Yes. (Well, actually, sometimes theirs are better!)

But if I never hand someone else the microphone, they’ll never learn to present. And I’ll have to do it forever. They’ll never feel empowered, and I’ll never feel free.

If I keep holding Penelope back from feeding herself and our team back from stepping into leadership, I’m communicating two things:

1. There’s something wrong with the messy slowness of learning to do something for the first time.

2. I don’t trust you.

Given that neither of those things is true in the least, I better get my grip off that spoon and that microphone, quick.

I want P to know that I love her and that she’s okay no matter how much sweet potato she has on her face and how little made it into her mouth.

I want our team to know that you don’t have to be perfect to become successful. You simply have to be willing to take action and improve little by little over time.

Letting go of control so that other people can learn is way messier and way slower than doing those things yourself. But it’s way more effective than being the one who has to do everything in the long run.

Letting someone else take the reins communicates that you trust them and you believe in them. {Tweet it.}

Letting Someone Else Take The Reins - Tweet

Hand something over to someone else. Relax if doesn’t get done perfectly. And enjoy the freedom that comes when they eventually nail it and you’re free to do something else.



Do you find it hard to let other people do things because you think you’ll do it better? What’s one area of your life where you could hand the control over to someone else to give you more freedom? I’d love to hear about it in the comments!


P.S. Did you miss my chat yesterday The Truth About Your Belly Fat & Bank Account – A Conversation with Kate Northrup & Sarah Jenks? You can still get a copy of the recording by clicking here!


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How my boobs changed my relationship with money.


I was texting with a girlfriend about pumping breast milk a couple of months ago. She’s with her little one and running her businesses from home just like I am. Neither of us have much of a need for a freezer stash of breast milk beyond enough to cover an emergency. She’s barely ever pumped….

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How to Make Your Competition Irrelevant: Chris Ducker on Glimpse TV


There’s something about a man with a British accent that simply makes everything he says sound that much smarter. It doesn’t hurt that, with or without the accent, Chris Ducker is brilliant when it comes to taking yourself out of the rat race of business so that you can enjoy true freedom. After getting totally…

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I was stumped.

I’d always had a clear vision of what I wanted: a beautiful house on the ocean in Maine, an adorable (and adoring) husband, plenty of space to host friends and family, and dogs and babies running around. Plus, of course, the financial freedom to support it all so my (adoring) husband and I could be…

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The Infinite Possibilities in Saying “I Do”

I used to think that freedom meant boundlessness. I used to think it was like looking at a vast horizon with every possibility in the world. I used to think freedom meant the ability to choose literally anything at anytime… and to change my mind at the float of a feather. I’m about to make…

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If you really want freedom you have to do this one thing.

When I find myself doing Q + A (which is often because I love it), I’m frequently asked: “How can I make more money?” It’s a hot topic, no? My answer is always some variation on: “If you want to make more money you have to add more value.” (Click to tweet) But it’s not always as…

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3 Simple Steps to Avoid Burnout When You’re Self-Employed

Today is a special day because I have the last episode of Financial Freedom Friday to share with you! So many people go into business for themselves because they want freedom. And owning your own business is one of the best ways to create time and financial freedom. But here’s the problem: working for yourself…

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On feeling trapped and breaking free. (In place of Financial Freedom Friday.)

I’m a professional freedom seeker. It says so right in my bio. I gave myself that title because that’s the most accurate way to describe the motivation behind almost everything I do in life. The first time I put out an episode of Financial Freedom Friday I got nervous. Oh no. Now I have to…

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Guided Meditation for Money & Forgiveness

We’ve all made mistakes when it comes to money. We’ve overspent, lent the wrong person some cash, chosen a vendor who over-promised and under-delivered, paid our taxes late, lost some money in a relationship gone wrong or [insert your money mistake here.] But it’s not making financial mistakes that’s the problem. It’s holding ourselves hostage…

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What you want is closer than you think and here’s why.

There’s this funny, sort of modern-day fable someone once told me about some investment banker-type guys who took a trip to Mexico. They’re sitting around in this seaside village and they notice an elderly Mexican gentleman fishing at the end of a pier. In talking with him they find out that a huge supply of…

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