Taking yourself seriously doesn’t mean you have to be serious.

Taking-yourself-seriously-doesnt-mean-you-have-to-be-serious

I always had this idea that if I took myself seriously as a business woman, author, speaker, and what have you, I would have to stop having fun with my work.

So I prided myself on not taking myself too seriously.

It made me more approachable. It made me more likeable.

And, if I’m being honest (which I always am), it made me stay smaller than I was capable of.

Here are some of the ways not taking myself seriously would show up:

  • Turning mic drop moments into sorority girl moments by giggling a little after my most poignant points during a speaking gig.
  • Downplaying my work by telling new people I meet that I’m a blogger, or that I sell vitamins, or that I’m an internet marketer. (While all of these things are true, they’re miniscule versions of the truth.)
  • Not putting the systems in place in our business to ensure accuracy and quality in our communication to our customers (like the three emails I sent in one day with the wrong time for a webinar because I couldn’t slow down long enough to figure out the time zones).
  • Moving too fast so that the quality of my work suffered. (Yes, done is better than perfect. And done is sometimes even better than good. But repeatedly putting out work with errors is plain amateur.)

I’d convinced myself that I wasn’t taking myself seriously because I didn’t want to take the fun out of business. But the truth was I wasn’t taking myself seriously because I was afraid if I did that people wouldn’t like me.

After a particularly humiliating series of emails with errors went out to our entire community, I realized it was time to make a change.

Stephen Pressfield talks about the turning pro moment in his book by the same name. He says everyone who’s a pro remembers the moment they made the shift.

I decided this was my moment. It was time to take myself and my business seriously. No, it didn’t mean sucking the fun out of business. It meant having the courage to do my best work despite my fear of being less likeable because of it.

So Mike and I popped Penelope in the stroller and went down to the beach. I drew a line in the sand with the toe of my boot (it was February) and spoke about turning pro, being unafraid to shine, and taking ourselves and our business seriously.

And then we held hands and crossed over the line in the sand.

It was time to turn pro, so we did.

Taking myself seriously doesn’t mean not making any more mistakes. It doesn’t mean being perfect. It doesn’t mean having it all together.

But it does mean taking my foot off the break when my intention is to accelerate.

It does mean putting a lid on my knee jerk self-deprecation and downplaying.

It does mean expressing something with gravitas and then shutting up to let it land.

Taking yourself seriously doesn’t mean you have to be serious. {Tweet it.}

Taking yourself seriously doesn’t mean you have to be serious-tweet

We can still have fun while having the courage to bring our best selves to the table.

Perhaps you’ve heard one of my favorite quotes:

Anything worth taking seriously is worth making fun of. ~Tom Lehrer {Tweet it.}

Anything worth taking seriously is worth making fun of-tweet

I used to think that meant laughing off my accomplishments and being okay with putting in 80% effort instead of 100%.

But now I realize it was simply a cover-up for a good, old-fashioned fear of success.

I figured out that I didn’t have to choose between being a professional and enjoying the hell out of running a business.

True masters know how to take themselves seriously while having fun in the process.

I’m having a ball on the other side of that line in the sand, aligning myself with the following intention:

May I bring my best self to the table in my business and my life. May I have the courage to shine, regardless of whom that might make uncomfortable (including myself). May I operate as a total pro and also have tons of fun while I do it. May my willingness to step into my version of greatness while being able to make fun of the process inspire others to do the same.

If you like this intention, feel free to join me in intending it for yourself.

The thing is, having fun isn’t just for kids and it’s not just for amateurs. It’s for all of us.

And valuing our power and contribution isn’t only for professionals. It’s for anyone doing anything worth doing.

So let’s not let our fun preclude us from doing things that matter. And let’s not let valuing ourselves and our work preclude us from having fun.

We can have it all when it comes to being powerful and having a good time doing it.

Seriously.

OVER TO YOU:

Have you ever noticed yourself dimming your light in order to be more likeable instead of really going for it? Have you had a “turning pro” moment? Tell me about it in the comments – I’d love to hear about your experience!

22 comments

How to Use Your Longing to Fit in to Your Advantage.

How-to-use-longing_EMAIL

Humans are herd creatures. Our survival as children depended upon the love and acceptance of other human beings. Our blood flow as a fetus depended upon how happy our mother was, even. It’s no mystery why we all care so much what everyone else thinks of us and how happy we seem to be making…

Continue Reading
19 comments

You don’t have to keep going.

You-Dont-Have-To-Keep-Going-Email

Growing up, I loved to start things. Well actually, as an adult I love to start things, too. Who we are is pretty much who we are. I tried piano, soccer, swimming, tennis, theater, voice lessons, dance, set painting, photography, the literary magazine, student council, a book club, multiple little businesses, and more. Some of…

Continue Reading
33 comments

Hold out.

Hold-Out_email

Hold out …for the one you’ve been waiting for. …for the guy who treats you like the gold that you are. …for the idea that visits you in your dreams and you can’t wait to get cracking on every day. …for the house that feels like it was built for you. …for the friends who…

Continue Reading
23 comments

The slow, messy, effective path to freedom.

Slow-Messy-Effective-Path-ToFreedom_email

When I’m feeding my baby Penelope, sometimes she likes to grab the spoon and feed herself.  Anyone who’s ever witnessed a baby feed herself knows that more food ends up on her face, in her hair, and on the floor than in her mouth. It’s way more tidy and efficient when I just spoon food…

Continue Reading
8 comments

How to deal when you don’t get what you want.

How-To-Deal-When-You-Don't-Get-What-You-Want_email

Sometimes you ask for what you want and you get it and it’s awesome. And sometimes you don’t. The cutie you were ogling from across the bar asks your friend for her number instead of yours. You launch your new product that’s been in the works for over a year, and you hear crickets instead…

Continue Reading
11 comments

I thought this was going to be easier.

I-Thought-This-Was-Going-To-Be-Easier_Email

Mom, I thought this was going to be easier. I just didn’t get it. Everyone, including you, told me this was going to be hard. But I had no idea. I heard women talking about how once they had kids they could barely figure out how to shower, let alone string a sentence together or…

Continue Reading
58 comments

You can’t control the things most worth having.

Most-Worth-Having_Email

There are things you can control: what you put in your mouth, which radio station you listen to, and what you say, to name a few. If you’d asked me if we could control our lives a few years ago I would have said an unequivocal yes. And I would have thought you were wrong…

Continue Reading
13 comments

If you do this you’ll get what you want.

If-you-do-this-you'll-get-what-you-want_Email

The other day I left to run a few errands and asked our nanny to give Baby P a bottle while I was out. I simply said, “a bottle,” without any more specifics. When I came home I realized that she’d made a bottle for the baby with quite a bit more milk than we…

Continue Reading
37 comments

I don’t know what I’m doing (and you probably don’t either).

I-don't-know-what-I'm-doing_EMAIL

It took me until I was 26 to realize that my parents didn’t know everything. Most people realize that in high school and go through a rebellious phase right around the same time. I was a little slow on the uptake. My parents are both incredibly smart, accomplished, wonderful humans. But, they are just that:…

Continue Reading
47 comments